


Hanzo Takes Jesse To Pound Town: A Short Fanfic

by Interrobang



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Humor, M/M, McCree Is Legally Obligated To Say Yeehaw At Least Once Every Round Of Intercourse, there are so many bad jokes in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-07
Updated: 2019-05-07
Packaged: 2020-02-27 11:46:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18738370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Interrobang/pseuds/Interrobang
Summary: Someone paid me to write about them arguing about who tops and then too many bad jokes happened on Twitter.





	Hanzo Takes Jesse To Pound Town: A Short Fanfic

**Author's Note:**

> for the love of god do not take this too seriously. i tried to take it seriously and then i Died

Jesse’s brain was too fried to articulate his night all that well. They’d planned to go out; they’d stayed in instead. Hanzo kissed like he wanted to eat Jesse alive, hands squeezing and petting in some kind of secret pattern that triggered Jesse’s instinct to melt.

It was all going very well. Jesse was gearing up to show Hanzo the best night of his life. Judging by the way he was gently laid down in Hanzo’s bed, Jesse thought he might be in for a wild night with Hanzo’s ridiculous oral fixation. But then Hanzo reached for a condom...and started to put it on himself.

“Now hold up,” Jesse said breathlessly. “Why are  _ you  _ wearing the condom?”

  
Hanzo raised an eyebrow at him. “Because we are about to have sex? I assumed you would not want me to...clog your plumbing, as you so delicately put it not two hours ago.”

“I’m not about to lay back like some pillow princess and  _ let the dragon consume me,”  _ Jesse scoffed. 

“You do not have to lay back,” Hanzo pointed out. “You may sit atop me if that is your wish.”

“I can--” McCree gaped. “Why don’t  _ you  _ want to do it?”

Hanzo shrugged and stretched, looking for all the world like the discussion meant nothing to him. “It is not what I’m looking for from this particular encounter.”

“This particular encounter?” Jesse gawked at him. “So it’s not off the table?”

“Other nights, other circumstances,” Hanzo said. Then he leaned in, covering Jesse’s body with his own. He tweaked one of Jesse’s nipples, laughing smugly when Jesse jumped. He pressed another kiss to Jesse’s shoulder, teeth grazing up to his neck. “Tonight I wish to treat you well.” 

Not quite convinced, Jesse sat up, shoving Hanzo away for a second. “Why does that mean  _ my  _ ass is on the menu?”

Hanzo rolled his eyes. “Because your ass is as fine as any I have ever seen.” He sat up and looked at Jesse very seriously, then said, “You have an ass like a human tiger. Like you use your great powerful muscles to launch into deadly strikes.” He stopped, staring at Jesse before his lip twitched, breaking his stern facade. “It’s objectively a nice ass, Jesse.”

Jesse broke down into great roaring laughter, shaking with the force of it. Hanzo rode out the snorting and fits of giggles with aplomb, holding on like he was riding a mechanical bull, his face contorted in glee. When Jesse finally calmed down and wiped a tear from one eye, Hanzo lay his head on Jesse’s chest and looked at him with hooded eyes.

“May we continue?” 

“Yeah,” Jesse said, one last chuckle escaping him. “If you’re gonna get all  _ theatrical  _ about it, I guess we can. C’mere.” 

He wrapped Hanzo up in his arms, kissing him soundly. They grabbed at each other, pressing close, tangling in a sweaty knot that was punctuated by the occasional giggle. Jesse ground his hips against Hanzo’s, grabbing their cocks and stroking them together. 

Hanzo bit his lip-- moaned, loud and urgent. He gripped one of Jesse’s knees; he bent his thigh outward a bit, used the leverage to get even closer. Pressed a kiss to Jesse’s shoulder, chasing a mole with his tongue.

Hanzo rubbed his dick back and forth over Jesse’s taint, slipping through lube and sweat in the crease between his cheeks. Jesse panted heavily.

“You’ll like it,” Hanzo promised, pressing a biting kiss to Jesse’s neck. “Feels so good--”

“Stop trying to sweet-talk me and just do it,” Jesse said, rolling his eyes. He shuddered as Hanzo prodded him with his dick one more time before pressing against his hole in earnest.

Jesse tried very hard to be dignified about it all. But the stretch was something else. Intense, as expected. Vaguely uncomfortable, except that Hanzo was so  _ close, _ arching over him with his hair sweat-damp and stuck to his temples, caught up in himself because of  _ Jesse _ .

Hanzo moved slowly at first, grinding against Jesse in small movements-- his attempt at holding back?-- absentmindedly stroking Jesse’s cock while they both got used to the position. At first Jesse thought maybe he was trying to be a gentleman about it, easing Jesse into everything, but as Jesse adjusted-- even started moving against Hanzo a bit-- the cowboy noted that more than anything, Hanzo seemed to be protecting  _ himself.  _

“Feels good?” Jesse purred. He tried flexing a little bit. By the way Hanzo grunted and his hips stuttered, it must have made a difference.

But then Hanzo gripped both of Jesse’s knees, abruptly folding him up until his ass was presented like a beautiful offering for one very lucky god. 

Hanzo smirked, though it was broken by a genuine smile and pink cheeks. “Cute. Buckle up, cowboy. We’re about to go for a ride.”

Jesse barely had time to shout a sarcastic “Yeehaw!” before Hanzo took him to pound town.

**Author's Note:**

> fight me on Twitter i'm @GoInterrobang


End file.
